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13th June 2011

3:12pm: campfire
Campfire was pretty great. Kristen and I rigged four points from two trees - it's cool figuring out how to rig off a tree without having to climb up into it. Using sleeves around the rope to prevent damage and learning better knots and things like that.

I taught 4 1.5 hours classes in aerial, tumbling, and body balancing and learned some better ways of teaching too. For instance in the "tumbling with fire" class I first taught people to do parkour rolls, dive rolls, and then cartwheels. Then I started showing them how to do those things with their fire props. I felt like as soon as the props were added people got much more excited so I think I should have taught parkour rolls and then immediately added the props to that trick and THEN move onto the next trick. So I guess the idea is to get to the money shot a bit faster.

Or another way of putting it is instead of building up one continuous thread to a climax you'd build up little threads with little climaxes and so it's an up-down kind of thing.

16th May 2011

1:37pm: While walking home saturday night I had that thing when someone is walking towards you and you both kind of sidestep but the same way and it's like you're doing a dance, and when the guy walked past me he muttered "I'll kill you". Yes, we should totally fight because we were in each others way! Or even better, we should fight to the death! This sidewalk will only be owned by one man! The strongest and deadliest! I really hate the negative vibe around my neighborhood on weekend nights, especially after bar close. It's all good until the bars close and then there's about an hour of total bullshit going on. People just being complete jerks and bitches. Agressive shouting, cackling, cars gunning their engines like they're 2fast and 2furious, and lots of police sirens (which for the first time ever make me feel safer). I was trying to brainstorm some sort of art project that would make people less agressive and mean - like what if I handed out ice-cream bars and balloons? Would that make people less asshole-y? That's not the best idea, I'd probably get mugged for all my ice-cream bars.

5th May 2011

2:54pm: To THE AUTHORS of 1613
I received the list of the email addresses of the representatives that authored bill HF1613 from a friend of mine yesterday, this message is addressed to all of them (you).

I currently live in downtown Minneapolis in the warehouse district. Since you probably won't really process anything I'm about to say until you can figure out my sexual orientation and political affiliation I'll just tell you I'm gay and usually vote for liberal candidates. I came to Minneapolis fifteen years ago to go to the University of Minnesota (Twin Cities campus) since I could get in-state tuition because of reciprocity with South Dakota. Since I've graduated I've started a small business that's been successful for ten years now. I've never had cause to consider this isn't a place I wouldn't stay. I get up and go to work, pay my bills and taxes, and I was a volunteer with the Peace Corps for two years because I believe in public service and trying to make the world a better place even if it sounds hippy-ish to say it like that.

I watched the live feed of the discussion of the amendment in the Senate Judiciary Committee last Friday. I was unable to watch the House discussion and haven't been able to find any archive of it online. I've seen some testimony that different people have posted on Facebook from the House discussion though.

Watching the arguments on the side of support for this amendment I see that all the arguments are based on religious viewpoints. I don't share those religious beliefs so to me this amendment seems like a way to push those religious beliefs held by a majority (if the amendment passes) on a minority that doesn't hold those beliefs.

The people who oppose the societal acceptance of homosexuality want to bring up a popular vote on the issue to 'prove' that the majority of people think homosexuality is wrong "once and for all". If that happens with a 51% to 49% breakdown like pretty much everything is looking like politically lately does that really mean it should be in the Constitution? What else could we vote on like this? Why would we even need politicians if all we're going to do when we disagree is bring up a popular vote on it and put in the Constitution?

To me you're just afraid that time will tell through the court system that the current laws making same sex marriage illegal (DOMA) is NOT constitutional - so you're trying to lock it in that it's not before popular opinion finally turns completely against you. Younger people don't really think this is an issue as much, and polls over time are showing the public opinion is turning towards support for acceptance of same sex marriage.

I also feel like this issue is being used by politicians as a way to get more voters out on the next election, and that's just sad.

I thought that what Senator John Marty during the Senate hearing was great - for those of you who are married - do you think that the public should have been allowed to vote on whether you were allowed to marry your spouse? Think about it that way and see how you feel. Does that feel right to you? I'm trying to put this in a personal context because the outcome of this is going to affect me personally, and that's exactly how it's going to feel to me. Why should people I don't even know get to pass judgement on my life? I never hurt anyone, I work hard, I pay my bills and my taxes, I've fallen in (and out) love, I'm going to die someday, but somehow I don't deserve to have what you have?

You need to start thinking about the fact that everyone should be treated equally, we should all be treated the same in the eyes of the government. If you don't agree because of some religious beliefs, then that is between you and your God, it should not be between me and your God.

Passing this law isn't going to make gay people vanish off the face of the planet, and it's not going to make gay people stop having long term relationships. All it accomplishes is enshrining discrimination into the basis of our law, not to mention pushing our society towards a theocracy. I don't think that a simple public majority should be the defining characteristic of the foundation of our laws, especially when pretty much every election these days is running so close. Tyranny of the majority and all that.

All this is going to accomplish is increasing the divisiveness that seems to be growing in our country, why can't we work towards things we all agree on? How about this - I'm completely willing to agree not to try to marry another man for ten years, or try to push my ideas about it for those ten years if any one of you can personally agree not to push your ideas against it and we could instead focus on things we agree on. I bet we can find something. I'll even sign something to prove it if one of you could step up and do the same. I bet we could find LOTS of things we could agree on. Here's a simple one - the roads in the city are mess! We have budget problems. Downtown Minneapolis on the weekends after bar close looks like the zombie apocalypse with drunken club goers causing chaotic spectacle and crime EVERY WEEKEND! Someone got shot outside my building just this past weekend. Maybe there's some way to work on that sort of thing instead. I bet you'd find lots of supporters and people to vote for you if you could figure that one out. But I don't think you're about actually solving real problems, it's easier to do this to get people out to the voting booths.

Maybe you'll get your way, maybe the amendment will pass. If it does, I'm probably going to end up moving out of state eventually. I'll move somewhere else where people can mind their own business and leave their religious viewpoints out of my life. Maybe you think that's great, maybe you think I SHOULD move somewhere else. Maybe you think it'd be great if I never existed to begin with.

The worst thing is maybe you actually think you're right about it too. But I do exist and nothing you think or do is going to stop that from being true, so why do you need to make my life miserable? I didn't make myself exist, I'm just making due with the life I've been given just like you.

How depressing, and I probably wasted a good couple hours writing this to absolutely no effect.

12th August 2010

11:50am: trouble every day
Don't you know that this could start
On any street in any town
In any state if any clown
Decides that now's the time to fight
For some ideal he thinks is right
And if a million more agree
There ain't no Great Society
As it applies to you and me
Our country isn't free
And the law refuses to see

frank zappa
part of the lyrics from trouble every day

8th July 2010

3:45pm: Here is the first torture clip I made for the Splounge cabaret -> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VY33IXgZp6E

20th June 2010

2:29pm: surprise helicopter ride

on my birthday!

Posted by ShoZu

16th June 2010

2:13pm: eye tests
I've had two more eye tests in the past few weeks as part of trying to figure out what is up with my vision. Pretty interesting - they seemed a bit more scientific somehow, but were not very comfortable and involved having stuff touching my eyeball for a long time while I had to stare at things while not blinking.

Last week I had the first of these tests at the U of M, which involved sitting in a pitch black room for 20 minutes to isolate the response of the rods in my retina. Then I had electrodes attached to my face around my eyes along with an electrode that was attached to my lower eyelid and had a bit that came up around and touched my eyeball right under the pupil. Then I looked into a spherical chamber that had flashing lights of ever increasing brightness. Finally the lights were turned on and we did the same kind of test to measure the response of my cones. I did this with each eye and the entire test took about two hours. I thought it was an odd kind of endurance challenge to not go completely bonkers and rip the shit off my face especially the thing rubbing on my eyeball and not blinking is kind of hard when you're staring at strobing lights.

That was nothing compared to yesterday though, which involved having this viscous honey-like liquid put in my eyes to keep them lubricated but made your eye feel so weird, and then this ring was put in there to keep the eye open and inside the ring was a special electrode-contact lens with wires coming out of it and then I looked into a camera kind of thing with a honeycomb strobing pattern, while the response of my macula (the central vision part of the retina) was measured. Each eye took about 20 minutes, holy cow was I glad to not have stuff in my eye that kept them open, I kept thinking of A Clockwork Orange. I went home and slept it was nice to keep my eyes closed they were burning.

So now apparently the ophthalmologist will have enough information to make some sort of diagnosis. God I hope so I don't want to start moving into EKGs or some crap, so far I feel like I have had so many tests and nobody will tell me any sort of even ballpark diagnosis or even just to rule out things they know it can't be or that is unlikely.

29th April 2010

11:13am: steve jobs attacks flash again today
steve jobs attacks Flash

Once again companies are vying for control over how content is developed, and consumers and developers are going to suffer. Maybe a Flash plug-in for Mobile Safari is going to be a performance hit, but as a consumer I'm happy to take that hit if I can at least view the content.

Personally I'm pissed every time I'm using my iPhone and I click on a link to content that ends up being Flash content that I can't view ESPECIALLY when it is video. Jobs comments about "Flash is no longer necessary to watch video or consume any kind of Web content." are only true if you expect all those developers to rework their content just for distribution on the iPhone. With this thinking you're forcing developers to create special content for every type of mobile device which ends up being too costly in the long run. This was the issue with the browser wars and Netscape vs. Explorer. The companies will keep changing the method of delivery, adding and removing features, forcing rewrites, and generally creating a moving target in terms of the content code.

So expect your phone to suck for viewing web content for the next two-three years because all these companies creating these mobile devices are not going to realize that they need to support existing content and standards rather than trying to get everyone to adopt only their own.

22nd April 2010

4:07pm: dreams
For awhile i was very focused on remembering my dreams, with the goal of increasing the frequency and length of my lucid dreams. It worked, but then I stopped. It was when I was living with C. Why did I stop? I don't know!

There was this article today about how memory and dreaming seems connected:

naps improve memory

It's nice to see this kind of research getting airplay. It's also great to get some solid research that refutes the idea that dreams aren't really worth anything (which persists despite tons of research to the contrary). Consciousness, dreaming, and memory are all connected and it's sad to me that dreams are seen as unimportant, that people don't really care to listen to other people recount their dreams, and that they don't really think about their own dreams.

This morning I was trying to do acrobatics in my dream, specifically this kind of thing where I was trying to whip my leg behind and around the other leg while running forward. It's not any kind of trick I've ever learned but it was cool that I was trying, and I think it was my mind's attempt at getting lucid.

8th April 2010

10:54am: Tahini Bean Noodles
I made this last night not following a recipe just using what I had around and it turned out to be the most delicious thing ever

Tahini Bean Noodles

Can 3 bean salad
Some more vegetables if you like I used snow peas and mushrooms
Noodles of some sort I used Udon noodles
Peanut Butter
crushed nuts
A lime
Sesame Oil
Soy Sauce
Rice Vinegar

Start some water boiling, add noodles and follow those noodle cooking directions

fry Tofu in some oil
when it is looking good add some vegetables and fry those too
when those are starting to get good and fried
Add some rice vinegar a splash you know
Add some sesame oil
Add some soy sauce
the amounts of these things are not measured just do it by taste/what smells good to you
Add some sugar because it makes it better, again just do it to taste I just kind of sprinkle it over the top and let it soak in then stir it up

drain noodles add some oil toss so noodles don't stick to each other

open can of 3 bean salad, drain some of the juice but not all because it is tangy and good
put the beans in a big bowl

add noodles
add tofu/vegetables
gloop some tahini in there stir it all up
add a spoonful of peanut butter
i had to add more oil so the tahini and peanut butter didn't stick it all up
add salt
add crushed nuts
squeeze lime to put delicious lime juice over everything, lots and lots of lime juice stir it up

i had to put it all back in a pot and heat the whole thing up at this point to finish.

31st March 2010

12:41pm: phelps is gonna win
It looks like not only is phelps' organization going to win the legal right to show up at people's funerals and shout 'your faggot son is burning in hell' at the families of dead soldiers (wtf?), but it also looks like the court is going to force the family pay the legal costs for the case. Sweet!

I don't know how I feel about it really, it seems so wrong they can do that - I think people should have the right to privacy for funeral services.

I wish I could grow to giant size and vomit all over this news article

The worst part is the attitude the protesters have that they are prophets and they're going to be proven right when this epic biblical event happens. It just really pisses me off!

"When the Supreme Court unanimously upholds the 4th Circuit, it's going to put this country in a rage, and we will be expelled," she said. "But whenever it was time for an epic event in the Bible, the thing that happened right before is the prophets were removed from the land, and that's what's going to happen to us. ... We're going to sprint to the end of this race."

30th March 2010

3:20pm: rasmussen reports
most of the polls conservatives have been quoting lately have been coming from rasmussen reports. i've been reading about this company and there's some interesting things about the people behind this company, it's worth reading:


26th March 2010

1:21pm: DADT
I think it's great that Don't Ask Don't Tell looks like it's going to eventually be repealed but until then...

Gates eases ban on gays in the military

Among other things, Gates said the Pentagon is raising the threshold for what constitutes an appropriate level of information necessary to launch a "credible inquiry" into allegations of homosexual behavior.

Appropriate levels of information...such as...? This just seems to open up the doors for lots of great comedy. Like legal definitions of pornography, I love that there's a boardroom somewhere where people have to talk in detail and hammer out "reasonable and approprate levels of information regarding homosexual behavior". I want the tapes from those kind of meetings so bad.

22nd March 2010

6:10pm: ouch
I started doing Krav Maga again a couple weeks ago, I really like it.

This past Saturday we learned how to escape bear hugs. Most people who know me well won't be surprised to hear that I thought "why would I want to escape a bear hug?" of course but that's not the point. Anyway, the way you do it if the person is behind you is you hit the person in the nuts (almost always the first thing you do when attacked in Krav Maga), and then you stomp on their feet maybe to further 'soften the target' (which I think it's great anything that's kind of vicious and falls under 'dirty fighting' is called 'softening the target') and then you can throw an elbow up behind you to hopefully hit the person on the jaw.

It comes from below like an uppercut, and while we were practicing it during a drill the guy I was attacking was a bit too eager and really did hit me with this elbow thing pretty much perfectly how you're supposed to, and it wasn't full power but I felt my jaw clap shut and bit my tongue pretty hard. It hurt really bad where my jaw is connected to my skull and my tongue hurt the most but I knew I was okay, though it stunned me. So what I learned is to keep my mouth shut tight and my tongue in and my head back watching out for those elbows! Also I learned to not ever get elbowed anywhere in the head full force it will probably knock you out.

15th March 2010

5:44pm: hooray for non-science! (sounds like nonsense)

“I reject the notion by the left of a constitutional separation of church and state,” said David Bradley, a conservative from Beaumont who works in real estate. “I have $1,000 for the charity of your choice if you can find it in the Constitution.”

I think it's actually that pesky first amendment of the Bill of Rights that started it all. Part of the Constitution or not? Mmmm...I don't think I will collect my thousand bucks from this dude though...
12:17pm: vegan lemon pie
I just wanted to share this recipe I made yesterday for pi day. It turned out great, and I had never made this sort of pie before (I felt like I was doing science when I made it somehow, it was scary but I just went for it!).


I used both lemon and lime instead of just lemon. For the crust I just used a premade graham cracker crust I bought at the store for a couple bucks. This actually turns out to be a pretty cheap pie too.

The recipe makes enough goo for one full pie, but I think it would be better to make two pies filled halfway and then have some kind of whipped topping on top. Anybody have any good whipped cream topping recipes? Something fluffy and sweet would be pretty good with this pie which is really tart.

9th March 2010

5:29pm: no it is not made by the creators of The Onion
for a truly mind-warping experience of what it would be like to travel to a parallel universe head on over to


5th March 2010

1:10pm: free handouts
I'm gonna rant on the whole 'no free handouts' political angle that some people have.

The 'no free handouts' argument is based on this idea that there's all these poor people who want rich people to support them because they don't want to get a job.

I think that people aren't advocating for 'free handouts' for themselves. I don't think the people who are politically active trying to get health care for poor people are trying to help themselves - they're advocating for people who aren't able to help themselves. You have to be realistic and look at some of the people in our world and decide what kind of world you want to live in. I've been thinking about this because my roommate works in a homeless shelter and tells me these stories and I think most people who are against 'free handouts' aren't really in touch with reality.

In Minnesota, the General Assistance Medical Care program supports (or rather supported - past tense) people who are really in a bad position. For example - some are mentally ill and homeless and maybe they live under a bridge and they might have a place they can receive mail but really don't check their mail too often, so telling them to apply for MinnesotaCare is a joke. Also if MinnesotaCare gets mail bounced back because your address changed or you didn't receive your mail then they cancel your coverage and you have to reapply. You gotta stay on top of it to keep it active. Also, MinnesotaCare doesn't cover pre-existing conditions. GMAC is just something that works from the hospital and patient perspective without so much effort.

Is it really so bad to support these people? What does it really take to support them? They're not asking for hot tubs and champagne btw, they're not asking for anything actually. But maybe they come into a homeless shelter and someone sees they've got a huge hernia that's gone really bad, why can't we help them get it fixed? We can't give them medical care because they should "get a job"? Sometimes conservatives call liberals unrealistic. Talk about unrealistic! Why are we so heartless? It's pretty depressing. This is why Pawlenty sucks.

3rd March 2010

11:41am: Fualau is the master

Fualau is the master
Originally uploaded by dangerhotrod
This is probably my favorite picture from Samoa, because it is artsy, and it was a really wild day.

Fualau took me and a couple other people behind Lefaga bay to an uninhabited beach. The trip there was crazy, us outside the reef and waves breaking on cliffs all along the way. I worried for my safety and felt really vulnerable in that little paupau, but it was really cool and it felt dramatic and exciting too.

11th February 2010

4:38pm: Homosexual men may perpetuate genes by nurturing nieces and nephews
Interesting article, mostly because they used samoan fa'afafines as subjects


1st February 2010

1:09pm: oh if only i were wealthy
i would buy this new sex robot (the most life-like yet!)...


...and watch cherry2000 with my new companion. man that would be such a fun night!
a couple samples from cherry2000
E: "Romance?"
Sam: "Yeah, romance!"
E: "With a robot? I mean, we are talking about a robot, aren't we?"

Sam: "The man is a psychopathic killer."
Ginger: "Don't impose your values on me, Sam."

21st January 2010

2:54pm: --Omar Khayyam (Fitzgerald translation)
O, Love! Could'st Thou and I with Fate conspire
To grasp the sorry scheme of things entire,
Would we not shatter it to bits
And then remould it closer to the heart's desire?
12:10pm: it could have been even cooler
I know it was so long ago, but after rewatching The Matrix again I can't stop expecting Neo to take both pills. The first time I saw it I really thought he was going to. I still really wish he would have done that.

To take the third choice not offered seems way more transcendental and a way of thinking in ways that would break the matrix. Plus they could have made a big deal about nobody having done that before - he is the one, etc.

Also the AI should have been using The Matrix as a processor for things they couldn't do themselves - that there was some quality of the human mind that did calculations the AI couldn't duplicate and the Matrix was this huge parallel processing machine - a world mind or maybe the AI used the human's dreams...not the whole battery thing.

14th January 2010

2:33pm: man that would piss me off

Nice comment I found on this news story:

"Im not gay. I have gay friends, they are nice peopel and fun to hang out with and I have nothing against their lifestyle choice.

That being said, marriage is and always has been a very sacred vow be...tween a man and a woman. Not a man and a man.

The gay community is always seeking some type of 'equality' and its really starting to get quite annoying.

Cant you all just let it be? You're gay, we get it. Time to move on. Marriage is over-rated anyway."

If I have any 'friends' who would say such a thing, you can fuck off for pretty much forever. And if possible I'd like you to come say it to my face so I can kick you in the nuts.

I'm pretty amazed someone would think this way and believe that they are actually friends to their gay friends. The idea that I could have friends that think this way makes me want to barf. I don't think I do, but man it is disturbing to think there are people like this in the world. I would much rather have a bunch of people in the world that are vocally against me because I'm gay heck even want to kill me because I'm gay than have a single friend who thought this way. Not about the political issue, but because your friends should be your friends and really get it.

"You're gay, we get it." Obviously not, fake friend.
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